Sexy Latina


Latinas are sexy. Period. They are extremely popular in porn and have grown as a dynamic and powerful cultural segment in Hollywood and our melting pot culture in North America. There are specific REASONS a man is attracted to a Latina. Some of these reasons are obvious, others not so much. I was fortunate enough to marry an extremely hot Venezuelan woman who looks like she is 29 and is actually in her mid 40’s. She went through her “post baby” frumpy phase like many women, but her culture, our marriage and our sex life pulled us both back from the brink of divorce to the roots of our lust and attraction.

How about spicing up your love life, with a little Latina flavor? Your woman may have a different heritage, but there is no rule that says ANY culture can’t learn a few pointers from another. After all, we aren’t called the melting pot because of our overly priced fondue restaurants.

I interviewed my wife and her sisters and got a consensus of what makes them so hot and what other women can learn from them. (Remember, Miss Universe has been Venezuelan more than any other country…Caliente!) Here’s how to inject sexy into your wife or girlfriend, Latina style.

Our Sexy Latina Minds

Latinas don’t want to be like men. We want equal rights and want to be as respected, but we aren’t men and have less masculine traits of any culture. We don’t want to be treated as men. We’re not men! We are unique, feminine and want to be treated like a lady.

We are females, we’re proud of that. We embrace everything that comes in the “female package”: sweetness, sensibility, intuition, creativity, delicateness, motherhood, the ability to nurture others…everything. The only masculine characteristic you will find in us is our stubbornness and resolve. Treat us like a princess and we’ll rock your world forever. Treat us poorly and we’ll throw rocks at your face until we throw your ass out.

We see men as partners; we believe partners should complement each other, not compete. We don’t believe we need to compete with men, or act like them, to be appreciated, respected and valuable. You are there to take care of us, first and foremost. Get over it. As long as you do that, you’ll be happy you did…get it?

Tip: Let him be the man. Laugh at his jokes. Wait for him to open the door. Ask for his help. Appeal to his masculinity, chivalry and strength.

Our Sexy Latina Body Language

“Latinas are privileged women in this subject. We have a freer, expressive body language; we have friendly, warm personalities, and the way we move is a direct reflection of that.”

We are not afraid of expressing our emotions with body language. We touch, we smile, we hug, we dance, and we sway our hips. We talk loud, we scream when we’re angry, we cry when we’re sad. We walk as free women, because we are! This independence is appealing only to strong men. If you are threatened by a strong woman, just get out of our way…we aren’t looking for you. We are hot and we want you to WANT us to be hot. (Click here to create a smokin’ hot wife)

Tip: Let your emotions show in your body language. Don’t restrain yourself with a polite varnish of demure; let your body tell the truth!

Our Sexy Latina Fashion

We use a lot of skirts and dresses. Long or short, it doesn’t matter; we love the most feminine outfit – the skirt. Shorts are always good as long as it shows off our tight little ass. And the blouses… we love delicate, sexy blouses! For those of us blessed with boobs or a good plastic surgeon, you’ll see we like our cleavage as much as you. A well dressed Latina is a feast to the eyes: some skin showing, thin strips over her shoulders, beautiful colors, curves and movement and maybe some embroidered detail. We are curvy, our skin is smooth and soft and we want to show it off.

Tip: Don’t dress like a man, unless you can’t avoid it. Don’t dress as if you were going to a funeral, either. When you go out, dress as though you are the center of attention.

Our Sexy Latina Personality

We are strong and we show it. We speak our mind. We’re passionate and expressive about what we like or dislike. We demand what we need, and we’re not shy of expressing our opinion. We know that a woman who shows her unique qualities is way more interesting. If you agree with everything, you’ll end up being in the background. Standing out means knowing who you are and not being shy about telling anyone about it.

By the same token, we are not ashamed when we express our need of protection, consolation, guidance, help or advice. Latinas don’t think being vulnerable is a sign of weakness. Quite the opposite, it is an expression of our femininity and your strength will compliment us.

Tip: Tell him what you really think. Ask for help. Be sincere and truthful; don’t “go along” just because you’re afraid of being different from the rest.

Our Sexy Latina Sexy Behavior

Latinas live in a permanent affair with life. We are naturally seductive; we flirt shamelessly. We know we are sexy, so we smile, walk, talk and dance as sexy women. We know our man is delighted with our company, so we smile and look at his eyes, we laugh, we touch his arm, and we play with our hair.

Strippers, pole dances and dirty dancing have nothing over a good salsa or reggaeton. I challenge you to find a sexier more mesmerizing dancer than a hot Latina. We invented this stuff! (Click below for an example)

Tip: Be self-confident; you can’t be sexy and insecure at once. Flirt with him; express your interest on him, through your behavior. Think naughty!

NOTE: None of the above statements means Latinas are submissive or promiscuous. We just see life through a more organic, harmonic and genuine point of view.

Thanks to Maria, Angel and Rosanna for their candor. You three sirens embody in your very soul what a sexual, interesting and feminine woman should be. For more ideas, tricks tips on making YOUR wife or girlfriend hot, click here.

This Stuff WORKS!


It’s not just me that is getting all the sex I can handle, plenty of guys (and gals) who have read my book and applied the principles are increasing the variety, spontaneity, and quantity of their sex lives.

Below is a letter I received the other day from Sweden. (Of course, we can all imagine what HIS hot wife looks like!)

Your sex life does NOT have to be infrequent, boring or average. You can take control of it and make it as steamy, naughty, or creative as you want. Have fun, read up, and don’t be afraid to try new things.

How To Make Your Wife a Slut


Schrreeeech! Hold on…Before you start thinking we are talking about passing your wife around at the next bachelor party, let’s get the facts straight.

There are 2 different “sluts”. The first one is the kind of girl that is a sex maniac and sleeps around with almost anyone. The second is the girl who is horny, ready, sensual and oh…did I say HORNY? Right. The difference is the second girl is selective. She may be a smokin’ hot vixen, but doesn’t sleep around. She has found the ONE GUY that she wants and worships and has no desire to go elsewhere. How to make your wife a slut means she will be YOUR SLUT and only for you to enjoy.

This article is going to focus on the second girl (Don’t worry too much if you are into the cuckold fetish of watching your wife bang other men. We’ll address your perverted fantasy another time)

The idea of a woman/wife who has a sex drive that is equal or HIGHER than yours is pretty appealing-right? Imagine if your girl really worshiped you. What would it be like if she couldn’t WAIT to attack you when you got home? What would it feel like if she woke up next to you in the morning, completely horny and said, “I have to have you…now.” Wouldn’t that change your outlook for the day? If you really want to make your wife a slut, you want her to do more than just TALK like that. You’ll probably want her to follow up with some steamy action, too. That is the tricky part.

Read on…

I am going to give you a step by step process for making YOUR wife a sex-crazed slut in the next 10 days. This process may have a few detours and depending on your woman’s background, personal history and  circumstances, you may see her change over in a few days or as long as a few months. Don’t stress about it. The journey to making your wife a slut is nearly as much fun as arriving there!

Creating a wife that worships you, adores you, fantasizes about you and wants to have sex with you in a variety of ways every day is the ultimate goal. You are going to unlock her fetishes, desires, and creativity and you will be increasing your creativity with new positions, toys, places, and ideas on a daily basis. Your sex life will be AMAZING. Her orgasms are going to double and your two will be laughing and playing on a consistent basis. Let’s get started!

Day 1 (Ongoing):
Change Your Attitude. There is virtually NO way to change ‘ol Ms. Frosty into a sex machine without changing YOURSELF first. Women aren’t wired like us, so you’ll have to put down sports illustrated and read a few pages of Cosmopolitan.

Put her on a pedestal. Start doing things that you might have done when you dated. Send her flowers, leave her a love note, call her for no reason, give her a sincere compliment, surprise her with a gift, tell one of her friends how great your wife is, do the dishes, take the kids on a field trip and give her a day of “do nothing”, send her to the spa, give her a foot massage, do the laundry, etc. You get the idea. Start taking ACTION and SPEAKING to her like she is a princess. Nothing will smooth over the “slut training” better than her knowledge that she is adored and respected by you. Being a slut commonly denotes a LACK of respect, so you must let her know how much you respect her now, otherwise, transforming her into a part-time slut will be demeaning.

Do one or any combination of the above mentioned actions on a daily basis. There is no end to this attitude and responsibility. If you want more and naughtier sex, get in the habit of treating her like a princess in public.

Day 2-4 (ongoing):
Communicate like a lady. Unfortunately, when men talk, they seem to go for “solution-mode” rather quickly. “Bob, let me tell you how Stacy messed up at work today.” Your response, “Why don’t you just tell her to stop doing that?”

Wrong answer, Bob.

Your job is not to give her a solution. Your job isn’t to respond AT ALL! Your mission is to listen, shut up, nod your head, and be empathetic. THAT is what women do and THAT is what will increase her trust, connection and security in you.  Without that secure feeling, it is difficult for her to trust you when you ask her to put the blindfold on next Friday! You want a smokin’ hot MILF, right? You are NOT going to get that without changing your tune a bit, Buster!

The first two steps are really like greasing the wheels, priming the pump, or preparing the field for play. Without this preparation, the remaining steps may get you the OPPOSITE reaction that you want.

Day 5-7:
Now that she sees that you listen, you can STRATEGICALLY direct future conversations towards the “slut training” that you desire.  IMMEDIATELY after draw her a bubble bath and give her a foot massage with the candles around the tub, bring out the razor and softly suggest if you can give her a trim (If she still has pubic hair). Her reaction will be one of three responses:

  1. No way! I don’t want you and a sharp object near me.
  2. Hmmm…I don’t know. That makes me kind of nervous. Why do you want to do that?
  3. Wow…I didn’t know it bothered you.
  4. Hmmm…sounds delightful.

Response to Answer  1.
If she is dead set against it, brush it off and say, “I was only joking. What I meant was can I pamper you some more? I have an idea…”

Response to Answer 2.
If she is hesitant and/or curious, simply say, “As you probably know, I’ve been really working hard at becoming closer to you. My love for you is boundless and I want to show you more every day that you mean more to me than anything. “(SAY THIS SHIT! Do not filter it. She may laugh, she may not believe you, but deep inside it makes any woman melt with euphoria) Continue by concluding, “I happened to have read in Cosmo that most women feel cleaner, sexier and their orgasms are MUCH more powerful.”

If she is already shaved or wax, SLOWLY introduce something else such as a toy, DVD porn, or slightly kinky idea at the PEAK of her relaxation with you. Naked, calm and sexy is the mood she MUST be in at the time of introducing your 1st step to “slutdom”.

Day 7-9:
After you have introduced a Brazilian wax job, dildo, or porn into her life, and she learns to appreciate it, you have accomplished 70% of the battle. The remaining 30% may be more difficult at first, but infinitely more exciting.

Tease her to please her. Most men are aroused in a matter of seconds. Most women take longer. The more you date her, romance her and treat her with respect, the more OPEN she will be to the very naughty thoughts that are in your brain! You need to double, triple or quadruple your foreplay time. Even though you and her may be ready for intercourse, the foreplay should turn into role play.

Don’t say a word about this. Simply go down on her for 15 minutes, make out for an extended period of time or if you can’t restrain yourself, during intercourse simply stop…slide down and start giving her cunnilingus. The more you EXTEND foreplay and MAKE HER ANXIOUS the more she will want you and desire you.

These two feelings of being completely open to you and a strong sexual desire are again; key moments to introduce your next perverted thought. At the peak of her excitement, blurt out some naughty sex talk. “You are so hot…I want to fuck you hard.” Or “OMG, you drive me insane…you are a very bad girl and need to be spanked.” You get the idea. The purpose is to say something OUT OF CHARACTER for you.  If you already talk like this, take it up a notch. Don’t DO what you are saying. Speak it and feel her body reaction (or listen to her reaction). The more in-tune you are with her body language, the easier this becomes.

Day 9-10:
Give her a mind-blowing orgasm. If she traditionally comes only once, afterwards cuddle with her and let her know how special she is. In the aftermath of delight, let her know your fantasy. Tell her that you adore her, but one of your fantasies is for her ON OCASSION, to be slutty. Let her know that yes, you love her and ONLY her, but its every guys fantasy to have a nympho in the bedroom and even if she role plays it for you on occasion, you would be eternally grateful.

I have known the most conservative, uptight moms who turn into complete whores in the bedroom. This doesn’t happen overnight and it doesn’t happen because you are some gigolo porn star. It happens because you have tapped into a woman’s’ core issues:

  1. Security. Make her feel secure in herself, her body and in your life.
  2. Trust. Let her know that you would never try anything she didn’t want to.
  3. Communication. It becomes free and non-judgmental to discuss ANY fantasy.

That is the short version on making your wife a slut. It can take a few days, a week or a few months, but the journey can be fun, sexy and challenging. Enjoy the ride. For more ideas, strategies, and tricks on getting more sex in your life, click on today!

Sex in Unusual Places!


After a few years you may run out of positions to try…sure you’ve found your top 2-3 favorite ones…the ones that are a 100% sure fire hit and get you and your spouse to share in the euphoria.

But what about WHERE you have sex? After you’ve “broken in” the rooms in the house, done it in the car or on the back patio, where can you go to add some spice and ‘ZIP’ in the relationship? Below are a few ideas I gleaned from my personal experience as well as a few other people. (I can’t and WON’T claim having sex in church or near the dumpster…yuk!)

You’ll never run out of places or WAYS to spice up your sex life! We are not talking porn here, just some edgy stuff to give your relationship some new life and vitality. If you don’t keep doing NEW things, someone is likely to get bored and have an affair and/or get divorced. Your sex life and your marriage may be at stake!

Send me YOUR entry as to the most UNUSUAL place you’ve had sex and win a copy of my book-FREE! Send me an email to or simply post your story or place in the comments section below.

  • In a public Jacuzzi with others around.
  • In my ex wife’s parent’s basement while they were home!
  • In a public park pavilion in daylight.
  • In the elevator at a 25 story hotel (quickie)
  • In the alley next to a dumpster (empty thank God) behind a nightclub.
  • On a trampoline in a college gymnasium.
  • On a picnic table outside of an icehouse. People were cheering us on.
  • In most of my friends bathrooms during parties.
  • In the front seat during road trips (in mustangs, very hard to do).
  • In my ex-boyfriend’s parents bed with my husband.
  • In a Christmas display in the middle of the shopping mall.
  • In the back bed of a ford f350 while being driven down the road.
  • In a confessional and behind the altar.
  • At an amusement park haunted house with people walking through.
  • At a baseball stadium pitcher’s mound (with the pitcher of course!).
  • In a jump tower on a military training field.
  • At the zoo in front of the monkey cage (after hours).
  • In a dentist chair (I worked in a dental office).
  • On the 50 yard line at Raven Stadium at night.
  • At an ice hockey arena change room in between games.
  • At an elementary school in an empty class room.
  • On top of a school building during a football game.
  • In the ladies room at a law office during business hours.
  • In a room full of guests (my girlfriend sitting on my lap and nobody was the wiser).
  • In the bathroom stall at parking garage.
  • In a park in the bushes next to a playground.
  • Under the Rheine main bridge downtown Mannheim.
  • On the roof of a high rise after a thunderstorm.
  • In a church up by the organ late on a Sunday night.
  • On a massage table one hour before the spa opened.
  • In the darkroom at a photography lab.
  • On the EXACT beach where they filmed “From Here to Eternity” in Hawaii.

Try something new and send an email to and let me know what new and unusual place you’ve had sex. Winner of the most UNUSUAL place will get a copy of my free book. Any other stories are welcome…all names changed or hidden to protect the guilty!

For more ideas, tips, strategies and ways to spice up your sex life, have a SMOKIN’hot wife visit today!

Yahoo BEST Answers to Marriage, Sex & Intimacy


I am a contributor to Yahoo Answers and have been fortunate enough to have been chosen for “best answer” nearly every week. While these answers are customized to the one who is asking and is based on VERY limited information, sometimes there is enough there to help others, too.

My husband is attracted towards other women?

Me and my husband are happily married but by male nature my husband is attracted towards other women (our one of the friend ). He has expressed her affection towereds her and I know all this.He told me that he has no emotional affection for her only once he wanted sex with her. I am excited and at the same time feel nervous to think about this. I don’t know what is this?? I feel once sex with her will give some excitement in our sex life but at the same time I feel it will involve him with her but she is quite far from our place so meeting regularly will not be possible for them so it could end easily.

Best Answer-Chosen By Asker

Adding excitement to a marriage is very important.
Your husband is NOT the exception…most men feel this way at some point and only a few confess it to their wives.While it is scary, please do NOT to the typical thing and either give in easily OR get mad. Applaud his honesty and talk about it further. Get some good reading material on the subject before you introduce another person into your bed. Is he talking about a three-some? If so, check out the book “Open” by Jenny Block.

Is he talking about using the other woman as a surrogate to increase his attraction towards you? This is not so easy…in fact, it is probably misplaced energy. (see further resources) The core issue is not deriving excitement from another person, but increasing COMMUNICATION AND INTIMACY WITH YOU!

If you work towards that, you two have a chance of creating a lustful affair with one another. Having your wife also be your girlfriend can be so much fun and WAY more safe than trying to insert another person. (resources listed)

Doug Steponin by Doug Steponin

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Thanks a lot! I have learned really a good advice from you!

5 Things Men Want More Than SEX


kissing_is_good_1I recently asked a friend of mine what men want in a relationship and she point blank told me, “That’s the easiest question ever,” she said. “Men just want sex!”

While her response was obvious, my response to her was not.

In studying and writing about relationships, sexuality and marriage for years, my husband and I have distilled the whole ‘love and relationship’ game to some basic communication fundamentals. Our blog sheds some light on communication basics and advanced strategies to create a passionate romance regardless of how long you’ve been together.

Would you be surprised if I told you sex isn’t even in the top 5 things men really want from their partner? Sure, they are visual and seem quite myopic in their hunger for sex. But, sex and the pleasure it provides isn’t the final emotional feeling that men want from their girlfriends and wives, in the end, it’s five other often overlooked and under-appreciated things that men crave, desire, want, and need to make their relationship the envy of their peers. Each of these five things can *lead* to great sex, but none require it. Curious? Read on…

Women, when your man feels at his best, he will seek out every opportunity to spend more time with you and to satisfy your needs. So, it’s in your best interest to give him what he wants (and it’s easier than you would ever believe), so you’ll get more of what you want. See how it works?

1.  Men Want To Be Adored

In every man, there is a little boy (Remember what a baby he is when he is sick?). A man’s ego is fragile. Before the industrial revolution, the man with the most amount of wealth (we’ll leave out the “big harem” example) was the strongest warrior and/or the most successful hunter. Ever since he’s traded in his spear for a pda, men have defined their masculinity through sports and/or financial success. The more you give him SPECIFIC accolades about his success, the clearer your message of love and respect will be towards him. Tell him why you love him so much, often and clearly. Let him know that he is important to you. Just as you may be his Princess, your man wants to know he’s your Prince.

2.  Men Want To Be Consulted

There is no need to pretend you’re stupid, but when you find something your man is knowledgeable or passionate about, let him take the stage. When you show a sincere interest in his knowledge base, the more you subtly stroke his ego. Again, don’t be sarcastic or placating. The more you take a sincere interest in his work and hobbies, the stronger your connection will become. Ask his opinion and let him feel he’s an active part of your decisions and choices.

3.  Men Want To Be Trusted

Many of us have been hurt or lied to, but if your man isn’t the one who hurt you, trust him. After we are hurt, we tend to keep our guard up. “Guilty until proven innocent” is a popular attitude after one is hurt. Trust must be earned after a person has lied, of course. But “innocent until proven guilty” can go a long way to building more of a connection that can lead to a two-way street of trust. Go out of your way to give him no reason to doubt you and your own trustworthiness. Let him know you feel safe and secure with him.

4.  Men Want To Feel Sexy

Of course it is time to stroke his…uhmm….ego, but men like to feel sexy, handsome or fit just as much as women do. You will get SO much mileage out of a few “Do you know how sexy you are to me?” or “You look hot in that!” comments. Keep the compliments sincere and specific. Don’t praise his beer gut and say, “More to love!” Like you, he knows what areas he has to work on. However, the more you point out his strong points, the more he will work on correcting his weaknesses as well. Additionally, he will start appreciating and complimenting you more too!

5.  Men Want You To Be Their Friend

Many men don’t have the traditional social outlets that women do to discuss their emotions, dreams, and fears. By being his friend first, without judging, you allow him to open up. Interestingly, men RARELY open up to other men. They are taught at an early age NOT to shed a tear which results in them not sharing their feelings in general. Coincidentally, most affairs are born from this. A man may have a difficult time sharing his deep troubles with his wife, but can with his secretary. OOPS! Be sure you set up a “safe zone” of conversation which allows him to be vulnerable and open. Letting him know that this “safe zone” (Both verbally and geographically) in NO WAY diminishes your opinion of his manliness in all other areas.

The love of a woman can make or break a man. The woman who criticizes her man creates what she despises. The woman who encourages her man and gives him what he truly wants creates what she inspires. Give your man what he wants and your life, your relationship, and your love will get better with every passing day. You will experience more loving, more caressing and more attention from your man than you ever imagined possible!

For more strategies and ideas on creating a sexually-charged romance with you wife, read my husband’s book and get YOUR wife to be as hot as me!

-Chris Steponin

How To Get My Wife Back


When I first considered this question a few years back, the smart ass in me also asked, “DO I want my wife back?” The answer, no surprise, was “That depends!”

Most people who marry, do so for love. That love starts off with butterflies in your stomach, an intangible “connection” and probably great sex. Maintaining and stimulating excitement in a marriage is difficult…for some, near impossible.

So if you find yourself asking, “How do I get my wife back?” and you also ask, “Do I want to?” you’re not alone. In fact, both questions are important enough to be worthy of discussion. Please leave your comments here and I will publish all of them that are worth.

“Do I want my wife back?”

If you have to ask, it isn’t because you don’t love her. It is most likely because you, her and your relationship has changed. She may not be that bubbly young bride anymore. You may not be that big dreaming conqueror like you were. In fact, people, like everything else, changes. Sure, you’d like the “former” wife back…but is that possible?

Yes and No.

If you are in midlife, it will be impossible to go back to being 26 again. Many midlife guys mistakenly think that hanging out with, or re-marrying a younger woman will somehow make THEM younger. It might make them feel younger, but nobody can stop the clock of life.

Your wife, like you, is changing. How you adapt and grow with that change is important. The more you can talk openly and honestly about yourself and your feelings as you go through life, the more likely you will come to the conclusion that you do want your wife back. You married her for some reason all those years ago. Why not consider staying the course and creating a NEW love affair with her!

That brings us to “How do I get my wife back.” How you do it is very similar to how you did it in the first place. Many guys begin to take their wives for granted because of routine and complacency. When was the last time you complimented her on her cooking? How often do you send flowers for no reason? When was the last time you stared into her eyes and said, “Boy you look hot!”

If you want to get your wife back, (and yes, Chuck, there are reasons she may have “checked out” of the relationship) then you must court her. You have to patiently and without expecting ANY instant results, put her on a pedestal and treat her like the princess she once was and can become again. Why don’t you do something impulsive like buy her a gift for no reason?

The hardest part about this is the reaction you may get. It can be as callous as “Forget it…you had your chance. I’m out of here!” to “What’s got into you?” Regardless of the reaction you receive it is important to stay the course and keep those cards and letters coming! For more tips, see my website.

In order to win her back, you must start by changing YOUR attitude and your expectations. First of all, don’t expect ANYTHING in return. It may have taken you months or years for the decline in your marriage. Don’t expect it to turn around in a matter of days or weeks. Second, keep your attitude uplifting and fresh. Don’t be over dramatic or too pushy. Read her body language and be subtle.

Here are a few ideas:

  • Take out the garbage early.
  • Vacuum the entire house before she comes home some day.
  • Help the kids with their homework.
  • Wash and wax her car as a surprise.
  • Send her flowers for no reason.
  • Leave rose petals on your bed and bedroom floor.
  • Give her a foot massage TONIGHT!
  • Make her a gourmet dinner.
  • Send her and her friends to the salon for 1/2 day.
  • Leave her 1/2 dozen  “love you” post it notes around the house
  • Kiss her gently and softly for 1/2 an hour with NO sex.
  • Compliment her in public to her friends
  • Put her on a pedestal REGARDLESS of her reaction.

There are thousands of things, activities and deeds you can do. Saying I love you is a great start. Showing it unconditionally will seal the deal most of the time. Speaking of time, THAT is your major weapon. If she is grumpy, frumpy or just plain disinterested, don’t despair. Your cheery attitude and bright smile is sure to wear on her eventually. Killing her with kindness will be fun! Go for it!!!

For more ideas, strategies and tips on creating a hot wife, visit today.

G-Spot Basics


woman_orgasmThe g-spot is a bean-shaped, spongy mass of nerve tissue that sits just under the frontal vaginal wall. Composed of tissue that closely resembles the corpora cavernosa erectile tissue in a man’s penis, the g-spot swells in size when a woman is aroused.

It’s named after gynecologist Ernst Grafenberg, who discovered it in 1944. But it goes back farther than that, being mentioned as a “sacred spot” over one-thousand years ago by shamanic elders who were the forerunners of today’s practitioners of tantric sex.

Is the g-spot: a magical ticket to sexual bliss? It’s a controversial subject, and there are divided opinions on its very existence. Some women love g-spot stimulation, some don’t, some are ambivalent, and some women don’t seem to have one.

So, how do you find out if your lady might enjoy stimulation of this mythical buried treasure?

To locate her g-spot, it’s best for her to be aroused, as it will be easier to find in an erect state. Have her lay on her back with her hips slightly lifted or propped up on a small pillow. Put one or two fingers inside her vaginal wall towards the front of her body (belly-button side). Reach in as far as you can go, and crook your fingers toward you in a “come hither” type movement, sliding your finger/s along the vaginal wall until you find a rough-textured area. The g-spot should feel ridged or nubbly compared to the rest of the vaginal canal and is generally found about 2 inches in, although it can lie pretty much anywhere along the front of the vaginal canal – even as far back as the cervix. It’s really more of an area then an actual “spot.”

Once you’ve determined that she has one, what do you do with it? Well, that depends. Some women enjoy g-spot stimulation and some women don’t. Be aware that how much she enjoys it may also depend on where she is in her menstrual cycle.

Often, the first sensation a woman will feel with stimulation of the g-spot is an urgent need to pee. This sensation usually passes fairly quickly, however, so if you’re both patient you can get past it and to the good stuff. It may be a good idea for her to make sure her bladder is empty before stimulation!

To manually stimulate the g-spot, you will need to experiment with different pressures and motions. Communicate to find out what is most pleasurable for her. Moving your finger/s in that “come hither” motion works well for a lot of women. Because the g-spot is located inside of the vaginal wall, you may need to exert a fair bit of pressure to stimulate it. Don’t be afraid to use a firm touch.

Using the fingers in a “tapping” motion works very well to stimulate the g-spot. Tap the area with your fingers and try varying the speed and firmness of the tapping.

Try to “work” the area with small circles. Each woman is different and may appreciate different stimulation techniques.

Also try using your other hand on the outside of her body and apply soft, downward pressure just above her pubic hairline. This may increase the stimulation by “sandwiching” the area between both hands. Don’t count out toys that are specifically made for g-spot stimulation. It can take some of the guesswork out of stimulation.

As for stimulation during sex, there are positions that can help you make intimate contact. If your dick naturally curves upward, you may have a built-in ability to stimulate her g-spot! If you don’t, then any position that maximizes contact with the front of her vaginal wall will work well. Woman-on-top-facing-you works well, she can also slightly lean back to take advantage of more front-vaginal contact. The missionary position works well if you prop her hips up – and works even better if she’s laying on the edge of something and you’re standing on the floor. You may not even need to prop her hips up. By standing, you have more control over the angle your dick goes in at. For advanced techniques at stimulating her brain along with her body, visit

Remember, each woman will have her preferences. Experiment and find out what works for your lady. She may really enjoy it, she may be annoyed by it or find it uncomfortable – or she may not even have one.

As women age they may respond more positively to g-spot stimulation. This is because their estrogen levels begin to decline and this causes their vaginal lining to become thinner, allowing easier access to the g-spot.

Importantly, some women can even ejaculate with g-spot stimulation! But keep in mind that the g-spot is not some kind of “magic button.” Just as with any other part of the body, some women will find its stimulation highly arousing, while others won’t. Don’t get too caught up in the semantics or treat it like a holy quest. Just enjoy the sexual exploration.

For more ideas and real -world advice on making YOUR wife hot, visit

Top 10 Reasons Men Cheat


The post below is re-blogged from Cindy English and her site, “Cheating Ways” She does not condone or judge the issue of infidelity. Her site has great material on the ins and outs (sorry about that pun!) of infidelity. I added a few comments as well.

The question is as old as the problem itself…

Why do men cheat?
Is monogamy really a myth?
Are guys predestined to cheat because it is human nature?

Scientists have long explained that men are biologically motivated to seek out multiple sex partners. This natural instinct ensures a healthy gene pool and the survival of our species.

If this is true, then one cannot expect fidelity from a man. It kind of lets guys off the hook when they wander doesn’t it?

So why do they feel guilty? If it is a man’s biological right to have sex wherever, whenever, with whomever, why should they worry about being caught?

Because somewhere along the way, self imposed “ethics” and “morality” placed restrictions on human behavior…including sex!

Perhaps if guys didn’t seem to derive such pleasure from sex, it wouldn’t be such a sin. Think about it. If sex with multiple partners were just another “chore” for men as cleaning house and cooking meals is to women, would we get upset about it?

Probably not…poor guys!
Nevertheless…men do enjoy sex…a lot…and not always with their partner!

Here are their Top 10 reasons…

I’d like to say that they are in no particular order but, we all know what guys say is the number one reason that they cheat. Remember ladies, the jokes about sex ending when marriage begins, wouldn’t be funny if there weren’t some truth to them!

  1. Not getting enough at home! Women tend to get caught up in “life” and sex gets put on the “back burner”. She may be bent over helping the kids tie their shoes but he’s still looking at her “nice ass”. God…is that all they think about?
  2. It’s reassuring to know that he’s still “got it”. Time has a way of making us all feel less sexy and desirable. A little forbidden rendezvous can be a real shot to a sagging male ego.
  3. The wife just isn’t physically appealing anymore. Face it, women do tend to let themselves go. Often they get too busy raising their families and neglect themselves. They are too tired to put on make up or do those thigh slimming exercises. The result? A sexy new secretary and whatdayaknow…”Honey…I have to work late”! Don’t let this happen. Your wife WANTS to be hot and your support and encouragement may be the catlyst she needs.
  4. Sex at home is boring. The wife doesn’t like to try new things (or old things – namely, blow jobs!). To men, variety is the spice of life and he may have some sexual urges that his wife is not willing to fulfill. He may have some ideas that he would rather his wife didn’t know about. Can you say “manage-a-trios”?
  5. He just couldn’t say no. The woman was hot and all over him. It just seemed like a once in a lifetime opportunity…too good to pass up. This is where the phrase “thinking with their little head” came from!
  6. The wife just isn’t fun anymore. She worries, she nags, she fusses and they fight all of the time. He cheats to “get away from it all”. Guys, this is half YOUR fault! Be sure to be fun yourself and treat her right.
  7. He just doesn’t love his wife anymore. And just how do you tell someone that tactfully? It is easier to have an affair than it is to deal with the pain and emotional upheaval of such a confession. On the other hand…if he is caught cheating? Well, the door is then opened for a speedy exit!
  8. The thrill of the chase is exhilarating. Some men are truly addicted not only to the act of sex itself, but to the hunt. They thrive on the rush they get when they are able to conquer even the toughest “ice queen”. It’s not about love, it’s about control and winning! Men are built for competition and war.
  9. They cheat because they can. Many men know that their wives are insecure and dependant on them. They also know that low self esteem and a fear of being alone will keep her “in place” and “at home” no matter what, or who they do. So, why not? Variety – remember?
  10. And finally, men cheat to get even! It is an absolute blow to the male ego for his sexual prowess to be in question. Why else would a woman cheat on him? His own affair as a result, serves two purposes, revenge and reassurance of manhood.

These are the top 10 reasons. There are probably many more. Are any of them “excuseable”? Mmmm…a couple…maybe (although most women won’t agree).

Are any of them “preventable”?
Of course.

Although monogamy may not human nature…it is a choice!

For more ideas and strategies to create a LOVE AFFAIR with your wife, visit and have the passionate relationship you deserve.

How Can You Get Your Husband To Do The Dishes?


As any responsible journalist (Is that what I am now? LOL) it is my duty to not only share what I know about love, sex, marriage, and intimacy from a man’s perspective, but also check out what the ladies are thinking! I know the old jokes about it being impossible to understand women, but as you read my blog and book, you’ll see that it is really quite simple and boils down to open, honest, and NON-JUDGMENTAL communication. I was reading an article from  the site, today about “How to get your husband to do the dishes” and burst out in laughter!!! OBVIOUSLY written by a counselor or a woman, they gave the reader 6 techniques on how to influence him to help out around the house.

Of course you guys MUST help out around the house…it is a team thing, this marriage! But, men know that of all the 6 “ideas” and “strategies” of influencing us to change our behavior, talking and threats don’t work! The LAST idea works 100% of the time, of course. Since it was a short article, I hope the author placed it last as the final and most EFFECTIVE method.

As a man, that’s the way I read it…Here is that last tip:

Have sex: frankly, many people will use all kinds of excuses to explain why they are frustrated, except the real truth. And the truth might be that you are just feeling neglected. Be honest with yourself and discuss it with your husband. And there is nothing wrong with leaving the dishes in the sink while you both take care of more important business right there in the kitchen. The messier, the, How Can You Get Your husband to Do the Dishes?, Aug 2009

You should read the whole article.