Surprise Sex


When a couple has a routine, they have established a basic human need in their life.


Certainty is a core need for all people. Some need it more than others. Remember when your child wanted to watch the same movie over and over and over again? It drove you nuts, but it struck a chord in their need for certainty. This need does not leave us.

When you have sex in that ‘particular’ position or do that ‘special trick’ with your tongue, you KNOW that you will achieve an orgasm for your partner. This certainty give us comfort and that is good.

However, their is another human need that varies from person to person.


This can also be defined as uncertainty to be clear. However, when we are surprised by a birthday present, a bonus check at work or a $20 bill under the seat of the car, this surprise gives us an endorphin rush like no other. Thrill seekers understand this and often push the limits of their skydiving, rock climbing adventrues to new heights whenever possible. It isn’t just the thrill of almost dying…it is the uncertainty of what comes next .

So it is with your romance.

Surprise your lady tonight with something extreme. Don’t just put on a toolbelt and ask here where the thermostat is, push the limits of what she knows to be safe, secure and certain. Here are a few ideas:

1. Take her out and don’t tell her where you are going. Check into a hotel. Don’t go home.

2. Book a weekend getaway to somewhere romantic. Leave the airline itinerary out. Scratch out the location.

3. Send her a male strip-o-gram.

4. Put rose petals on the bed, light candles and put a romantic movie on.

5. Take her to the theatre.

6. Compliment her passionately about her hair.

7. Volunteer at a shelter for a weekend.

8. Study the kama sutra at length. Engage in a new position every night for 2 months.

You get the idea. Mix things up a bit and let the chips fall where they may. When learning a new dance, you are bound to step on a few toes. So what.

For more ideas, visit today!

Adult Drive-Thru Store in Alabama Offers Privacy


HUNTSVILLE, Ala. (AP) — Gabrielle Silva takes down a customer’s order from the drive-thru window, stuffs a bag full of products and passes it outside to the couple waiting in a car. Unless you are from Alabama, you probably didn’t know that vibrators are illegal.

In fact, unless you have a medical, scientific, educational, legislative, judicial, or law enforcemen need for a sex toy, you are subject to a misdemeanor offense in Alabama, the third notch in the bible belt.

Don’t believe me? You can read the full article here.

What year is this, anyway?

It’s 2011, folks and its time we realize that sex isn’t bad, naughty or should be a secret. Heck, without it, our species and ALL life on this planet wouldn’t be here! What’s the deal?

Thankfully, creative entrepreneurs like Florida businesswoman, Sherri Williams developed a workaround for this archaic law. Customers buying toys — items that can be used for sexual stimulation — fill out an anonymous form with 10 questions including whether they or a partner have difficulty with sexual fullfillment.

What is it about sex that makes people anxious, nervous and feel the need to hide it-act as if nobody does it? Clearly, based on businesspeople such as Williams, the sex toy industry does more to bring happiness and joy than most other entertainment products. In fact, the ability to save a marriage probably does more for our society than all the legislation lawmakers can throw at same-sex marriage or any other moral-based laws.

So the next time you are in Alabama, be sure to pay a visit to Pleasures One Stop Romance Shop. The marriage you save, could be your own.

For more ideas, tips and strategies on creating a super-charged sex and love life, check out my book Make Your Wife Hot by clicking here.

Are you Naughty or Nice?


Are you naughty or nice?

Can’t you be both?

Don’t we want it all? Wouldn’t it be perfect to have a nice girl in public and a naughty girl in private?

Guys, it is up to you to encourage, develop and affirm your gal’s desire to take on both roles. The best way to encourage nice, professional behavior is to support her needs as a woman, mother, friend, daughter and wife. The best way to do this is to SEE things from her perspective while maintaining your masculinity. Understanding a woman’s needs isn’t the same as SYMPATHIZING with those needs.

In fact, when a man is TOO touchy feely, he becomes emasculated and subconsciously unattractive to most women. Women desire a strong male as a partner. You must understand her needs without becoming one of her “girl friends.”

Affirming her nice side is a simple as encouraging and being genuinely interested in her work regardless if it is outside the home or not. You don’t have to take up needlepoint, but show her you care  about her hobbies, interests and life by asking questions and really listening.

Now, how about that naughty side?

You can be with the most conservative, introverted woman and I guarantee you there is still a touch of naughty inside of her. She may not be open to the stripper pole in the bedroom (or she may!) but getting her sexy lingerie, a sex toy or a romantic dinner followed by a night in a hotel is a sure way to encourage her to open up and release her wild side.

Feed both of these personalities and show her that you love both of them equally. That is the only way to develop and grow the side you like most….the naughty one, of course! Duh!

For more ideas on making your wife hot, visit today!

Be a Cunning Linguist


Ok, so you know what that REALLY means, of course. Men fall into one of three categories. You either:

1. Enjoy, relish and absolutely get off on going down on a woman.

2. Do it as a courtesy and you neither dislike or like it.

3. It grosses you out.

If you really, really enjoy cunnilingus, then you know what you are doing. You treat the activity as art. You paint the alphabet with your tongue and understand the nuances of the clitoris and surrounding nerve centers. Your woman is pleasured and you routinely bring her to orgasm at will.

Congratulations! You are a cunning linguist. This double meaning actually holds true. A linguist is a person who speaks multiple languages and the language of love is perhaps the most complicated of all. By understanding, communicating and directing the pleasure centers of a woman, you are communicating at a very high level. It’s not just sex…you are communicating with her non-verbally.

If you are in categories #2 or #3, you should read my other blog post on the topic. The article gives you specific physical and emotional tactics to bring you into category #1.

Seriously, gentlemen…don’t treat this activity as a chore. If you are a category #2 or #3 man, take a moment and look at things from her perspective. Remove any bad memories or less than satisfying experiences of the past and pretend you are the best lick master in the world. Role play it out and see what happens. Who knows? You may learn to lick it…uh…I mean Like it!

For more ideas, strategies and concepts on making your sex life steamy, sexy and fulfilling, check out my book, “Make Your Wife Hot.” Your marriage and relationship has no where to go but up…just like your Johnson.

My Wife, a Stripper Pole & Naughty Neighbors


Alcohol and sex don’t necessarily mix!

Sure, a few drinks can loosen up the tightest of individuals (or legs) but too much alcohol can also impede a man’s ability to perform or worse, make you ugly. But sometimes a few drinks can simply make you goofy.

My wife and I certainly are not alcoholics (Is that denial too strong?) but we enjoy a nice glass of wine every once in a while. If the party and at mood is right, we might enjoy an extra glass or two! Woo hoo!

If you get moody or angry when you drink, reduce or eliminate alcohol from you diet. If you get silly or happy, bring a designated driver to document your foolishness.

Last week we attended a going away party for our neighbors we have known for over 13 years. We don’t see them every week, but when we DO get together, we always have a blast. Probably because we connect on so many levels. We share the same political views, our kids attend the same schools and both our wives are bi-curious.


Yup. Now, this common thread can be very dangerous with the wrong couples. There must be rules, boundries and months of discussion before “swinger-ville” can be introduced into a relationship. Without proper communication, this lifestyle can easily ruin the best marriage in the world.

Which is why we never, ever, ever thought we’d play with each other’s wives. It was discussed years ago and we agreed being neighbors made it a bit too creepy for our tastes. Plenty of open marriages or relationships have close friends in that world, we chose not to. It is a choice, not a judgement.

So, when they told us they were moving and we had a going away party, the thought of a “last hurrah” play night popped into both our wives heads. Josh and myself agreed early on that we didn’t want to have sex with each other’s wives out of respect for the boundries we had established as friends. The girls had also agreed to that and we had nearly 13 years of a traditional friendship.

Now that they were leaving, the girls had planned a surprise for us….a big one.

After dinner was over and all the other neighbors and guests had left, we were cleaning up in the kitchen and the girls excused themselves, giggled and left the kitchen for Josh and I. Yeah…we were clueless.

About 15 minutes later we retired into the living room to discover some dance music going, a portable pole erected in the middle of the room and two incredibly hot strippers were dancing together, fondling and kissing each other….our wives.

This lasted for a good 40 minutes until they couldn’t take the foreplay anymore. My wife’s bottoms came off and before I knew it, I had the lesbian show of the century in the living room of my neighbor. Excellent!

I will give you the intimate details in next week’s post….for now, use your imagination and take a look at my book, and start to train your wife to be naughty like mine.

Why We LOVE Butts


What is it about a woman’s rear that drives men crazy?

Now, don’t get me wrong. If you are a boob-guy or lose track of time when looking at a nice set of legs, I get it. In fact, throughout my life I have definitely transitioned from being a face-guy, to leg-man and…hell….I think it all matters!

But the rear? Really? I mean, boobs are sex toys, legs lead to that spot where they come together and eyes are the window to the soul.

The only thing a woman’s rear leads to is that place that is used to remove the waste products from her body. Sure, the rear is used for sitting. The muscles are there to support her frame and her butt is attached to those long, lean legs. But in and of itself, why is the butt of a woman appealing? What makes it special?

Generally speaking, curves coincide with a woman’s ability to conceive children. A woman with wider hips and bigger breasts have the equipment to bear children and breast feed.  A super slim streamlined woman with a smaller chest subconsciously may die at childbirth and/or be unable to breast feed. Of course this isn’t true, but to a man’s deep primordial DNA, big boobs win and when the hips match; score!

What is strange, however, is when there is an imbalance between the boobs and the butt. When a woman has a large rear and average or smaller breasts, it is generally not as appealing. When her breasts are full and her butt is small, generally she is considered attractive. Why?

Your comments are appreciated. I am a student of anthropology, human sexuality and relationships. Sometimes my posts are fun, obnoxious or insightful. From a purely sexual angle, big boobs and a small butt are an absolute JOY to behold and to have sex with. The idea of banging a big butt-yuk. But a round, full ass with breasts to match-yum! A set of full breasts with a small, tight ass-Yowza!

I am looking for feedback on this one, guys. Drop me a line.

Doug Steponin

For more ideas on transforming your frumpy, average wife into the trophy wife of your dreams, visit today.

Money Can Buy Happiness


There are really only two ways to have the trophy wife of your dreams and all the sex you can handle.

1. You can simply buy it (gold digger, concubine, or by the hour).

2. Become the charming, strong, secure, attentive and sexy man SHE craves.

If you don’t care about your health or your other relationships and have the means, maybe buying (or renting) your trophy wife is the path for you. Sure, I may kid about it, but that is only because I created my trophy wife BEFORE I had money. There are plenty of guys who bloom later in life and focused their energy on the almighty dollar. This path has worked for thousands of years.

The other path of working on your confidence, interpersonal communication, ab crunches and sex appeal is one that works for others. There are plenty of cabana boys and personal trainers who get more sex than they can handle. But, do they end up with a long-lasting relationship with the energizer bunny from the gym.

More importantly, do they even want that?

Of course, what WOMEN want is both!

Women want the security (translation: money) of a stable household and relationship and they also want to be swept off their feet by prince charming. I am not blaming them. After all, guys want Betty Crocker in the kitchen and a private whore in the bedroom. We all have needs, after all.

If you choose to focus on finances, you need to be wary of the gold digger who is faking her orgasms and having too many lunches with her personal trainer. If you care, that is.

The REAL solution is to work on both your charm and security. You see, security does relate to finances, but it is not the foundation for making a woman feel loved and secure. Her feelings of security are the foundation for her happiness, not the security itself.

There are millions of stories of men who were “up and coming” in their careers who scored the hot chicks even though they didn’t have two nickels to rub together. If you are in mid-life and haven’t hit your stride, your ability to show your woman that your time is just around the corner financially will go a long way to opening up her heart and her legs.

Balancing your energy between building your 401K, improving your health and taking tango lessons will be more than enough to make her feel loved, cherished and desired. When she has THOSE feelings, you are guaranteed that she will want to return the favor.

I am not saying that canceling your ESPN MVP club membership is required to win her heart. However, if you spend more time on creating a better you that appeals to her, you will create HER prince charming. When you are on that path and it is apparent to her that she has scored with the best catch of her life, you can get away with leaving the toilet seat up and occasionally farting during a game on TV….just don’t make it a habit.

For more strategies on creating a sexually-charged love affair with your wife, visit us at and order my book today. You’ll transform an average wife into the insane love-slave you desire!

Long Hair vs. Short Hair


What does hair length have to do with making your wife hot?


Many women look sexier with longer hair. Short hair can work, but it has to be on the right face, done properly and include an attitude to match. Longer hair is traditionally sexier on a woman because long hair that wax curvy and bouncy tends to match the rest of her body. Besides, men have short hair…without the curves, you may not be able to distinguish gender from a distance!

If your wife has longer hair, you probably don’t need to persuade her to do much to it. Unless it is a rat’s nest, straight or curly, long hair tends to look more feminine overall. Images of Lady Godiva or Rapunzel conjure up beauty, grace and sex appeal.

Short hair is simply butch.

So, what to do if your woman insists on having short hair?


For starters, there are hundreds of examples of cute, sexy and fun short hair styles that can still frame out a beautiful face and give that “come and do me look” that drives a man crazy. Strangely enough, women with a few extra pounds tend to look better with shorter hair. Additionally, if it is styled right, with some hair covering an eye, it can be extremely alluring and will give her the edge on the sultry, “just banged” look that makes you want her more.

Of course, there are high-profile examples of Halle Berry and others who look fantastic with short hair, long hair or even no hair! (Grace Jones and that chick from the first Star Trek movie)

In the end, fellas, for the sake of simplicity, long hair is traditionally sexier. Buying your gal a day at the spa and complimenting her looks always does more to encourage her sensuality than any critical explanation of the evolution of hair length. To get more sex and to keep it spicy in the bedroom, your ability to encourage, compliment and adore her will keep her self-esteem high and her libido in overdrive.

For more ideas on making your wife hot, visit and read my fully guaranteed book on transforming YOUR wife into that smokin’ hot trophy wife who turns heads and gives you the sexually-charged romance you desire.