Have a Guiltless Affair


It’s possible.

It’s easy.

It’s safe.

It can happen tonight!

Before you go to Craig’s list or some other dating site (where 1/2 or more of the people are married!) you should understand WHY people have affairs in the first place. The reason people have affairs is based in:

1. A breakdown in communication between a couple.

2. Fear that one person’s fantasy isn’t appropriate or makes the other person feel bad.

3. Is perceived that “if no one knows” no harm can be done.

While much of this is true, there is a way to have the steamy intrigue of an affair, NOT get caught and NOT technically cheat on the other person. We all want a bit of variety, excitement and the uncertainty of what’s next. When people have affairs, the atmosphere of cheating is a powerful aphrodisiac. You can recreate that in one of the two following methods.

Method #1: High level role play with your spouse. To pull method #1 off, you need to both take the following directions very seriously. If you giggle (or “break” as they say in Hollywood) the suspension of disbelief is over and your acting debut is a washout.

  • Get into character. Pick a new personality.
  • Take on an accent or personality that is not your own.
  • Keep that play acting up for an extended period of time and be consistent.
  • Change your environment. Get a new hotel or go someplace new.
  • Have sex vastly different than you normally do.
  • Wear new clothes and a different cologne.

In short, do everything possible to become a different person both in and out of the bedroom. BE that person who is unattainable. BECOME the fantasy your spouse has. Enjoy your affair and milk it for all its worth. It’s easier, safer and insanely more fun than the real thing…provided you put your heart into it.

I will roll out method #2 in the next blog post. Be sure to leave your comments, as they are very welcome.

-Doug Steponin


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