Make Your Wife Hot

Huh?

Cheating on your wife doesn’t sound like the right path if you want to make her hot…angry maybe but hot? Yeah, she’ll be boiling over with attorney letters if you do something as cowardly as cheat. If you want some sex on the side, but don’t want to get a divorce, I have the perfect and SAFE solution for you.

Cheat on your wife…with your wife.

In a previous post I mentioned how high-level role play can give you all the thrill and excitement of an affair without the fear of destroying your family or catching some nasty STD. Method #1 works wonders and while it can easily achieve 99% of the excitement of a real affair, it has zero liability. Pretty good trade off!

Method #2 involves an even higher level of persuasion, influence and work on your part. If you can pull it off, you will be in the top 10% of satisfied marriages. If you mess up any of the following procedures, you run the risk of months of therapy or worse.

Method #2 involves creating a bi-curious wife.

The strategy to do this STARTS in the mind and with a healthy dose of patience, almost anyone can pull it off. It will require some manipulation, but its all in good fun!

1. Be prince charming. Nothing warms up a woman like the perfect guy. Flowers, doing the dishes and lowering the toilet seat are the most overlooked acts of foreplay on the planet.

2. Schedule ongoing massages for her. Pamper your wife. As she gets used to the massages, start to change the provider. Move slooooowly over to erotic massage professionals ONLY after you accomplish steps 3-6.

3. Become an exceptional lover. Study cunnilingus techniques, Kama Sutra and simply spoil her rotten.

4. Introduce quality erotica into your bedroom. Start with a few toys for her and progress to some erotic stories, videos or other visual and sensory items to increase the quality of your lovemaking. Start to talk dirty and ask her to share some of her fantasies.

5. AFTER she shares some of hers, the next question is, “What about you, darling?” This is where you need to tread lightly. It’s OK to mention an asian flight attendant massaging her feet. It is not OK to suggest a three-some with your neighbor Buffy with the boob job. Talk only. Do it during sex. Create a three-some in your mind and hers during a passionate night of sex.

6. Let her know that having an affair is rooted in the excitement of things forbidden. The more forbidden it is, the more exciting it can be. Ask her openly about bi-sexuality. Do not ask her if she wants to perform, only ask her if she has ever thought about it. If you’ve planted enough visual and physical clues over the proceeding weeks, you have a shot.

7. Take her to a strip club. The classier the better. Touch her often and in the open. Find the classiest dancer there and buy a dance for your wife, not you! Alcohol always helps.

8. Schedule a wild evening at a swingers club. Most of them are BYOB. Bring her favorite libation to reduce her apprehension. When you go, assure her that you don’t have to DO anything. Many couples go there for the visual stimulation only. Touching is not expected, unless you are both ready.

If you’ve done a good job, you may have opened up your wife to being bi-curious. This is better than an affair! If you can get in a three-some every few months, you can have the excitement of a mistress with zero guilt and without destroying your marriage.

Good luck!
-Doug Steponin
http://www.makeyourwifehot.com

It’s possible.

It’s easy.

It’s safe.

It can happen tonight!

Before you go to Craig’s list or some other dating site (where 1/2 or more of the people are married!) you should understand WHY people have affairs in the first place. The reason people have affairs is based in:

1. A breakdown in communication between a couple.

2. Fear that one person’s fantasy isn’t appropriate or makes the other person feel bad.

3. Is perceived that “if no one knows” no harm can be done.

While much of this is true, there is a way to have the steamy intrigue of an affair, NOT get caught and NOT technically cheat on the other person. We all want a bit of variety, excitement and the uncertainty of what’s next. When people have affairs, the atmosphere of cheating is a powerful aphrodisiac. You can recreate that in one of the two following methods.

Method #1: High level role play with your spouse. To pull method #1 off, you need to both take the following directions very seriously. If you giggle (or “break” as they say in Hollywood) the suspension of disbelief is over and your acting debut is a washout.

• Get into character. Pick a new personality.
• Take on an accent or personality that is not your own.
• Keep that play acting up for an extended period of time and be consistent.
• Change your environment. Get a new hotel or go someplace new.
• Have sex vastly different than you normally do.
• Wear new clothes and a different cologne.

In short, do everything possible to become a different person both in and out of the bedroom. BE that person who is unattainable. BECOME the fantasy your spouse has. Enjoy your affair and milk it for all its worth. It’s easier, safer and insanely more fun than the real thing…provided you put your heart into it.

I will roll out method #2 in the next blog post. Be sure to leave your comments, as they are very welcome.

-Doug Steponin
http://www.makeyourwifehot.com

Was Tiger Woods having an affair? There is no clarity to his recent car accident and golf-club wielding wife’s desire to break a window or his cheating skull. All men of power and influence are susceptible to affairs. If he had one…chalk it up to his DNA, childhood or conflicted relegation of his powers. If, indeed it is true that he is “involved” with Rachel Uchitel, I can understand. It would be nothing new.

This is a pattern you may be familiar with. The alpha male, who has incredible laser focus on his work is a warrior, a conqueror and this personality is not limited to war or business. It often spills over into the world of seduction. On the surface they may be “good” people. He is an achiever; he has a nice wife and a beautiful family. But underneath the façade is a man who is built for conquest.

It is men (and some women) whose achievements expand exponentially who are in danger of having affairs. There are two main reasons for this.

1. 1. Environmental Influence. Men who are raised on “James Bond” and other fantasy visions of relationships may suffer from a mild or extreme case of sex and love addiction. The inability to have a deep, long-term relationship is often created from the role models we have as children. This easily explains why kids from divorced homes are more likely to divorce. The pattern has been established and we learn from our environment. When men see their fathers or role models embrace sex for sex’s sake, what are they learning?

As a young man enters puberty and begins to notice those newly developed breasts on his classmates, the process of maturity, courtship and dating begin. We experiment with the rituals of “going steady” “breaking up” and “falling in love.” It is during these times that we are imprinted with what works for us and what does not. Learning to differentiate between caring for someone and lust, between being genuine with someone or manipulating to get what we want is a game without a rule book. Learning how to accept someone “loving us” is a class that starts in adolescence and for some of us, becomes a never-ending lesson.

Similarly, when a young man has a father who is nurturing, compassionate and faithful to his wife, the imprint of fidelity has a chance. This does not guarantee or prevent infidelity, of course. However, the odds are stacked against youth from homes that have any variety of dysfunction.

On that note, we are hard-pressed to find ANY family without some degree of dysfunction. The “Cleaver” household is as fictional as your neighbors who appear to be the “perfect” family.

No such thing exists.

Surviving an affair is a journey anyone would be a fool to take alone. If you were the one having the affair or the victim of one, going at reconciliation or renewal alone will be a painful and long journey. I STRONGLY recommend the eBook “Break Free From the Affair” by Dr. Huizenga the Infidelity coach.

For men like Tiger Woods, who was probably busy golfing 4 hours per day, these opportunities may have been missed. Or perhaps his obsessive desire to win created a method of winning with the ladies. “Winning” meant conquest-not a deep, heartfelt relationship. I am not picking on Tiger, because at this date, we still have no confirmation of any infidelity.

1. 2. Over-Achiever Influence. The second manifestations of affairs come from our DNA of being warriors. Forget the imprinting and nurturing households. Men who compete in sports, politics, and business are merely acting out modern day survival and conqueror behaviors. Men who are taught or encouraged to achieve at all costs are usually successful. Powerful men wield their power and the more then earn, the more dangerous they become to themselves and others. The adage, “Power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely” has never been truer when the affairs are revealed amongst politicians, athletes, and titans of industry. Their alpha male characteristics spill over from business to relationships as naturally as a waterfall.

I believe high achievers often miss out on this important segment of their lives, since the ultimate achievement goal takes precedence. Their inner life and the richness experienced in relationships become dormant or non-existent.

Men are built for war. Women are built for sex. I apologize for putting it in such a callous manner, but since we don’t have breasts, it is an argument that has no defense. Certainly we can both become MORE than objects of conquest and reproduction, but we are designed for those functions and it is the evolution of civilization that allows us to become better.

Rachel Uchitel...victim, gold digger or just another hottie?

It is as simple as this.

Some men are further along on the evolutionary cycle than others. Men who understand how to wield and channel their power for the good of the tribe win. Those who are still learning how to develop loving feelings in a long-term relationship are those that will create the best families (Tribes) and hopefully pass on their character to their offspring.

For those of us who are still learning, let’s keep our lessons fresh in our minds and learn from our mistakes and the mistakes of others.

We don’t know yet, if Tiger was having an affair or not. Frankly, I don’t care.

But if the fall of a hero compels even one person to re-evaluate his destiny in life, then we move forward as a society. If you are involved or were involved in this common and confusing circumstance of an affair, you owe it to yourself to get a copy of the book, “Break Free From the Affair” today. You’ll save hours of sleepless nights and feel better about yourself, regardless of who did what.

Poor Mark Sanford…Just when the media barrage has died down about his midlife crisis, affair and “gone missing” time the ethics committee decide to investigate “ethics” HA!

"I LIKE MY LATINA WOMEN ABOUT THIS THIN"

Putting the title “ethics” on any governmental body is a joke. There are approximately 450,389,211 jokes about the moral and ethical hypocrisy with politicians (Compared to only 387,789,466 jokes about religious leaders moral quandaries).

Listen, Mark…you messed up. Rule #1 regarding mistresses or affairs is to use the “Godfather” strategy of keeping your friends close but your enemies closer. The Appalachian trail is SOOOO far away from South America. With no back up alibi, you were doomed to be caught (like 99% of all people who delve into infidelity) the moment you didn’t admit you WERE in Argentina. This is why many politicians (including those on ethics panels) only have affairs with interns and secretaries…it makes the alibis so much easier to substantiate. Sadly, your soul mate excuse doesn’t ring true to anybody buy yourself and approximately 2 million men and women in America who are going through a midlife crisis. I guess I am one of the few “free spirits” that understands your conflict.

How does Governor Sanford’s dilemma relate to you?

Are you having an affair?

Do you want to?

Are you getting over one?

During an affair, the excitement, intrigue and even danger of discovery is a intoxicating feeling. Actually, the high people get from an affair lasts longer than normal sex because the preparation for the interludes is rife with thoughts of your steamy liaison and the hiding of your whereabouts adds to your endorphin levels. Having an affair is extra exciting!

Of course, like any drug, the downside can be horrible. The guilt that many people bury can weigh on you like a migraine headache…pounding ceaselessly without any relief.

What makes it worse is the proliferation of dating sites (or hook up sites) that cater to married people! There are some that are blatant and obvious and others that are more subtle and offer articles weighing the pros and cons. If you are experimenting with an open marriage or think that you can handle the guilt along with the excitement of an affair, you may have already gone to sites like…

Europeans have never had as much trouble as the descendants of the Pilgrims here in the states. Having a mistress on the side is not necessarily as common as a Frenchman with bad manners, but it is more widely accepted in many cultures especially among powerful men.

If you are looking for a SAFE and EXCITING respite from your dull marriage or relationship, I have the perfect solution…

Have an affair WITH your girl!

It takes some practice and you will have a few embarrassing moments. Truthfully, it will never be 100% as exciting or thrilling as a real affair. But, if you can achieve 80-90% of the raw feelings during your preparation, role play and trist without the threat of STD’s or divorce, that seems like a good deal to anyone.

For details on creating a powerful affair with your wife or girlfriend, click on my earlier post “Roleplay=Foreplay” and start practicing your South American accent. The life you save will definitely be your own.

When is sex a scandal?

What is it about consenting adults relishing each others bodies that causes heads of state to stammer and talk show hosts confess to millions on air?

What is all the hoopla about, anyway?

The purpose of sex is to reproduce the species. Why our creator made it SO damn enjoyable is what has us all in a tizzy. You see, if we were like starfish or insects, we would be simply reproducing for the benefits of propagating the species.

Fortunately or unfortunately, our species LOVES sex. It is the brunt of more jokes, the intrigue of more movies, and dominates over 40% of all Internet sites. Obviously there is more to it than reproduction!

Somewhere along the way, sex became more than just reproduction. It became a symbol of marriage and fidelity to our partners. It became the physical manifestation of something intangible and mysterious-love.

For the perfect couple, the act of sex is the intertwining, not just of their legs, but their souls. The term “soul mate” is used often for two people who, regardless of sex, are connected eternally. This connection is celebrated in sex, but if the sex ever dies off, true soul mates stay together.

For less than perfect couples, the pursuit of sex (or the hunt) is a driving force of seeking pleasure. This driving need to have sex is what has allowed our species to proliferate the planet so successfully. What muddles our heads, hearts and news opinions is the societal opinion of what, where and who you have sex with.

Simply put, if you are married, you are supposed to have sex only with your spouse. There are biological, anthropological and social reasons for this. One of my favorite articles on this subject is The Monogamy Puzzle. Take some time and read through this. It is a fascinating piece.

If you are an employer, you are not supposed to have sex with your employees. In that case, sex is a weapon that can be used for advancement or even discharge. In David Letterman’s case, he was NOT married but living with his girl prior to marriage. He admitted to having sex with more than one other person during his co-habitation with his girlfriend. Clearly, as an unmarried man, he is free to do what he wants-right?

Wrong.

Women who live with a man, in this society, assume that a monogamous relationship is in place. “Moving in together” by common definition constitutes a covenant resembling marriage without the legal ties. If someone elects to see other people, living together would be cumbersome at best!

David, like many powerful men, chose to wield his charm and power without the common code that most of us adhere to. I am not judging him, mind you. Over half of married couples are victims of affairs during their marriage. This does not excuse infidelity, but it does point to a common thread that as monogamous as we claim to be, our legacy and heritage show us that it has been and will continue to be a constant struggle between sexual urges and societal mores.

Creating a lasting, loving and sexually charged relationship that spans years or decades is a very tall order. While half of couples do remain together, less than 10% claim to participate in active, vigorous, mind-blowing sex on a regular basis. If you want to be in the minority and have a smokin’ hot wife and off-the-chart sex, click on http://www.makeyourwifehot.com today. You, your heart and your body will be glad you did.

The internet has replaced our imaginations with stories of intrigue, romance and forbidden sexual encounters with clear an unambiguous imagery. Years ago, naughty stories and movies that left something to the imagination gave all of us a different view of the same scenario.

When people watch movies, they often project themselves into the character. “What would I do if I was them…” and things like that. How often have you expressed anger when a character in a horror movie deliberately walks into that dark house instead of simply going to the neighbors and call the police!

My wife and I enjoy watching porn every once in a while, but what REALLY gets both of us off are detailed stories about things that have happened to us in the past. Embellishing real events brings a reality to the fantasy that can drive anyone wild. Instead of projecting ourselves into a fictional character, my wife and I take TRUE incidents that have happened to us and twist the facts, names, and places around slightly. When we reveal these stories as part of our foreplay, the sparks ignite and we find ourselves totally in the moment. My wife are totally commited to creating crazy, passionate sex life for ourselves and love teaching others how to do the same. Click here for a copy of our book.

Recently, my wife told me a story about a long trip on an airplane years ago when our marriage was on the rocks. Enjoy…

It was going to be a long flight and I wasn’t tired. In fact, I was a bit annoyed, having just left home and totally ticked that my husband didn’t take me to the airport and didn’t even kiss me goodbye…things aren’t so good at home. In fact, I often have visions of leaving him…or killing him!

I checked through the gate without much of a delay and boarded the plane on time. Like most flights, the people around me were a mixed bag…families, singles, young and old. Normally, I get some non-descript ordinary person sitting next to me. I am not one for much conversation and since this was a night flight, I actually PLANNED on not even saying hello to whoever sat next to me.

Then he sits down next to me…OMG.

As much as I tried NOT to pay attention, it was impossible not to stare at the man who sat next to me….Mr. Charm. He was young, handsome, chiseled, strong, firm and a smile that could melt the anger and resentment of anyone.

What a dish. If only…No. I shouldn’t think those things. I should catch some sleep like I planned. As much as I tried to settle in and sleep, I couldn’t. Instantly these crazy, ridiculous fantasies explode into my head. What was wrong with me?! I don’t ever have fantasies about strangers! This is stupid…Close your eyes, Chris. Get some sleep.

It doesn’t work.

He notices I am fitful and starts the conversation with that wry little smile that nearly make me instantly wet. We chat a little and he is so full of life and happiness (unlike Mr. Cynical at home). He flirts a little bit in the conversation, but I brush it off. The more we talk, the more I am captivated by that smile and those tightly toned biceps. Why am I having these thoughts?! It is SO wrong.

How can a 20-something man be so gracious and interested in me? He asks me about my life, my goals and dreams. I have never sat so close to someone with so much…I don’t know…charisma. When he asks a question about me it doesn’t come off as conversational or casual. When he asks, the blue-steel eyes of his seem to pierce right through the normal defenses we put up talking to strangers. The connection is instant and unmistakable. Weird.

I ask him about his home, his life, and what he is doing. I figured he was a personal trainer or beach bum. “Consultant”, he replies. Oh, one of those. “Telling people what they already know and charging them for doing it,” I blurt out loud. He laughs with a burst of happiness, “Exactly! Those non-profits waste so much money and every time I save them a few million here or there, sure I get paid a great fee, but I am also reminded of all the REAL good I am doing! When the Cystic Fibrosis charity reduced their overhead by over $2 million last year, that money went straight into more research. I feel as though I donated $2 million.”

I instantly adored this guy.

When the conversation drew to a close, we seemed to know everything about each other, including little bits of our past. What tantalized me the most was his energy and enthusiasm for the future. He was hypnotic. He was bright. He was…oh…incredibly sexy.

The conversation ended casually and naturally and I thought that I drifted off to sleep. The transition to dreamland was fuzzy because I was STILL in my seat sleeping! Normally when I dream I am in high school and freaking out because I didn’t study for a test. This dream was so real! Maybe it wasn’t a dream at all? Perhaps the 2 cocktails, red-eye flight and connection with this guy put me in a new zone. I have no idea. My head slowly falls onto his shoulder, he doesn’t lift it or shrug it off, but gently turns my head to face his and give me the softest, sweetest kiss in the world.

I don’t resist.

We start making out! Is it a dream or is it real? His hand slides across my thigh and I feel the wetness start to flow inside my body. The kissing becomes more passionate and the breathing a little heavier. We readjust the blanket so my legs slowly slide apart. His hand doesn’t go up my thigh, but he keeps teasing me with his caress. I SO want him to finger me, but he won’t do it.

His kissing stops and he looks into my eyes…No…He looks into my lustful heart, locks onto my eyes, stares, saying nothing, just stares and cracks that dreamy smile. We both want more and don’t know if we should risk a trip to the washroom in back of the plane. My nervousness is mostly subsided because I still don’t know if this is a dream or reality.

We kiss some more and wraps his hand around my waist, pulling me close to his body. The heat and tingle of my inside is screaming for him to touch me. His hand gently glides up my leg and he deftly moves around my panties and stimulates my clit. OMG. This is SO WRONG! Why does it feel SO good? I haven’t had and orgasm in over 3 years! I am about to climax and he stops…I grab his hand and whisper in his ear, “Start what you finished, buster.” He does some double finger stimulation and somehow manages to roll one finger around my clit while pressing on my G spot with another. I shudder, moan softly and have the longest, deepest orgasm of my life. I fear the noises I am making will wake the other passengers or alert the flight attendant. I can’t control myself. The fantasy is real! I am totally into this guy and the feelings he has awakened inside of my heart and my body.

OMG…it rolls into a second orgasm and I want to grab his cock and have him slam it inside of my body. The craving is uncontrollable. As I roll down from the 2nd orgasm, I reach for his package and he holds my hand, kisses my ear and whispers, “This is only for you.” I think to myself, “Well, THAT is for me, too!” and move my hand to his pants. He resists and holds onto my hand, preventing me from unzipping his pants. I read his body language, stop my advance to his love stick and enjoy the afterglow of my double orgasm. His firm strong arm still gently lying across my body, light as a feather, but strong enough to hurl an anvil.

What have I done? Why don’t I feel guilty? Is this a dream or did it really happen? I don’t have feelings of confusion, just curiosity and warmth. The warmth of a chance encounter with a guy who has the body of a Chippendale dancer and a George Clooney smile and charm….Wow.

A few minutes later, I enter that realm of sleep/awake where you don’t know what is real or what isn’t. Did I have a wet dream? Did we actually do it? Did I join the mile high club? My blanket is still on me, I am definitely wet. I turn my head to look at this man and he is asleep…fast asleep. Oh…must have been a dream.

After I relax, adjust myself and start to pick up a magazine, I steal another glance at him and see that half-crooked smile appear across his lips…hmmm.

Chris Steponin

http://www.makeyourwifehot.com

I am no William Hurt, but my wife is definitely as hot as than Kathleen Turner and yesterday, I unknowingly recreated a famous scene from “Body Heat” in my own house! I don’t know how else to convince you, other than to say it again. You are an idiot if you don’t incorporate TIMING into your seduction. It isn’t as simple as coming on too strong or too weak (or both). It is a combination of mood, timing, and patience. The art of seduction, foreplay and teasing is timeless.  Watch the 30 second clip and let me explain a seduction story that happened yesterday…

As guys, we all know about “morning time”… our hormone levels are increased, there is noticeable bulge in the sheets and an incessant urge to pee. Managing our lust and our desire to relieve ourselves is a never-ending battle of “do I pee or should I try to slip Mr. Happy into his favorite spot?”  Yesterday, I opted for plan B and I rate the sex at about a B or B-. Now, I don’t blame her for not being 100%, I was still a little groggy and hadn’t worked out yet, so my own flexibility wasn’t up to par. (Then again, there is not much wrong with mediocre sex…still beats a good day at work!)

As it was a Sunday, we slept in after we were done with sex, got some chores got done, church was attended, and homework was started. The little woman, however, broke routine and had an afternoon shower. The feeling of being clean always tends to make her feel sexy. I was downstairs when I received my first dirty text, “I wish you were in the shower with me,” it read. “Hire 2 Asian courtesans to give you a sponge bath,” was my reply… and our light dirty text exchange that afternoon (yes…even in the same house, we still text really filthy stuff to each other) raised her hormone level and I found myself giving her foreplay without even being in the room. After her shower she came downstairs into my office, closed my door and locked it. (Hmm, I wonder what she wanted?) She sauntered over to my desk and in the most subtle, sweet and innocent manner, she whispered into my ear, “I wanna fuck you.”

Now, Sundays have always been kind of special at the Steponin’s. It is a day of rest, recuperation from the week and everyone has a chance to sleep in. By 2 PM, I was busy writing another article and wasn’t in the mood. As a guy, this normally doesn’t matter, because like you, I can get in the mood about as quickly as congress can pass a spending bill. I was in the writing zone, however, and truthfully, I was on a roll and wanted to finish my article. I didn’t want to break my concentration, so I did what most men wouldn’t do.

I refused her advances.

The difference was, I didn’t refuse and simply send her on her way. I knew she needed a few more orgasms. She is very hot so I elected to help out the best way I know how when I am not around. I simply told her, “Go upstairs, get out your favorite toy and break out the video camera. I want to watch you later.” She giggled and said, “Use my toy? Ok, but your son has the camera and I don’t want to mix up the tapes right now.”

Good idea.

Interestingly, after about 15 minutes, I was done with my article and decided to surprise my wife. I quietly slipped upstairs and tried to open the bedroom door. It was locked of course, so I did something dramatic, blazingly sexy and created a ultra passionate act that cost me around $34.

In one forceful push, I burst into my own bedroom, broke the trim on the door and rushed her. It wasn’t luck that she was about 3 minutes away from an orgasm. I can read her energy even from downstairs. She was hot, horny and didn’t care if I was around or not. She wanted it and my sincere refusal made her want sex even more. Her decision to take care of herself was sealed the second I refused to have sex with her.

My plan to surprise her was spontaneous, violent and passionate.

When I burst into the room, (resembling the scene in Body Heat with Kathleen Turner & William Hurt) breaking the trim and grabbed her legs, she was totally prepared to be banged to the brink of suffering, I knew that the foreplay was complete. She was TOTALLY shocked and instantly came when I entered her.  After the initial shock of breaking our own bedroom door, forcing myself upon her, and her orgasm had subsided, it was time to change pace. We opted for a few Kama Sutra positions that allowed for deep penetration. One of my favorites is having her lie on the back of the bed with her legs hanging over the edge. I grab her ass, lift it up about 15 degrees above the bed with her legs over my shoulders. This allows for an extra inch of penetration (feels like 2). Hitting her cervix with rapid pumps, her mind reeled and her eyes rolled back as she started up the ladder of her second orgasm.

I love Sundays…

###

For more ideas on how to rekindle REAL passion in your life, get more sex with your wife and create a steamy romance to keep her begging for more, visit www.makeyourwifehot.com right now. Make your wife the smokin’ hot MILF you want her to become and the next seduction story can be yours.

Governor Sanford, Mel Gibson, and 38 million men in their midlife can’t all be wrong! Midlife crisis (Or midlife transformation if you are a Buddhist or Zen expert) is a temporary situation. Your life isn’t over, but by the time your crisis is, you’ll be three years closer to the grave. Maybe you’ve had thoughts of taking up oil painting or taking up adrenaline-based activities like bungee jumping or  hiring hookers in Panama.

Not sure if you are in a midlife crisis? Have you had thoughts such as:

•You are seriously thinking about “hiring a pro” next time you are in Vegas.
•You recently looked in the mirror and saw your dad.
•Your wife is not appealing to you anymore (and Stacey in accounting definitely is!)
•Your sex drive is waning or you just can’t go as long as you did a few years ago.
•Your wife and you have drifted apart and don’t share the same enthusiasm for life.
•You flirt more than before and/or you have looked at more porn than usual.
•Your midsection is flabby no matter how much you diet or exercise
•You think more about the past than the future.

Hello, chump…you are in a midlife crisis!

A midlife crisis cannot be treated like any problem or challenge previously experienced. There is no article, book, or therapy session that will fix it all today. Going to a fantasy ball camp or going across the country on Harley’s with your friends won’t fix it all by itself either. The journey one must go through is just that-a journey. In order to come out of this phase BETTER, STRONGER and HAPPIER one will need to reflect, grow, and map out their personal journey. Here are 8 tips to help you cry, rejoice or stay miserable:

1. Stop reading stories about success! When a guy in MLC (midlife crisis) reads about some 11 year old learning to fly or some 28 year old billionaire, not only is it an EXTREME exception, it makes us normal guys physically sick. Read about Colonel Sanders or Ray Kroc. These guys didn’t hit their business stride until their MLC was over, and their pecker was gathering dust.

2. Share ALL your perverted thoughts with your spouse. Don’t hold back. Who cares that you “thought” about a three-some when you were in Vegas! Studies have shown that 82% of guys fantasize about it, 17% pull it off, and only 1% talk to their spouses about ANYTHING! Be a contrarian and let her know. That way she won’t be surprised if you leave her for a Peruvian cage dancer. Who knows, she may be one of the 12% of women who will entertain the idea of a three-some! If you want to try to beat these odds, go ahead and read “How to Convince your Wife to Bring Home a Girlfriend” on my blog.

3. Take some time every day to reflect, think, and beat off. Listen, your life may be at a crossroad and you may decide to keep sucking up to your boss and stay with your frumpy wife. Hell, you may even elect not to get a hooker, stay faithful and suck it up, so at least take some amount of time for yourself and be happy for 8-10 minutes!

4. Definitely exercise more. Your MLC isn’t because the world is moving faster than your Nike’s, it is because you have one Florsheim in the grave already. Don’t worry, dude, everybody returns to their youth, and just because you may be wearing diapers in a few years doesn’t mean you can’t have a sexy nurse feed you your oatmeal or leave a good looking corpse. The more you convert your frustration and anxiety into meaningful exercise, the better you will feel. Plus, if you decide to get a divorce your chances of landing a nubile 29 year old with father issues instead of your mom’s friends increases ten-fold.

5. Don’t hire an escort. It is simple psychology, really. You are getting old and your body craves young, fertile females to breed with. If you are married, you run a few risks (Duh!). I shouldn’t have to remind you, but since your brain has relocated 4 inches below your belt, you need a reminder. Your 15 minutes of pleasure will be a temporary escape from the reality of your age. You didn’t REALLY impress her, Chuck. You aren’t REALLY going to marry Julia Roberts like in Pretty Woman. (Unless you look like Richard Gere and have a few million of disposable cash)

6. Cry every once in a while in front of your wife. Go ahead, let go and let it out. When the guys get together, we won’t share THAT information! But when you let your guard down in front of her, she’ll see your vulnerability, get in touch with your sensitive side, and probably give you a hummer. In any case, you’ll win points for sharing and you deserve some kind of reward for that!

7. Find a person or venue to vent…really vent. Of all the things that will make you feel better temporarily (including physical exercise, basket weaving, or blowing stuff up) the ability to talk it out, scream, or just get the crap out of your head is very important. Many of us tend to ponder the same garbage over and over again in our brains. Dumping those thoughts either on paper, to a therapist, or a non-judgemental friend is important. (NOTE: Be sure not to dump TOO much on your buddy, otherwise you may bore him to death as he pretends to care about your garbage. Or worse, he may open up and share how HIS life is even more miserable than yours!)

8. Read a few articles on midlife transformation (Eastern philosophy). The word midlife crisis is used as a Western reference point only. It isn’t really a crisis in the grand scheme of things, after all. You haven’t lost your kids and brothers in a Nazi concentration camp, chump. It’s just that our society has paved the way for you to have SO MUCH free time, that you can actually do something with your life, if you want to. Our great grandfathers were too busy working 90 hours per week to notice they were going to croak at 48. Your situation gives you the GIFT of a second life. Don’t cry too much about it. You really can take up skeet shooting as a career as long as you’ve socked away a few bucks for the trailer home in Okeechobee.

-Doug Steponin
www.makeyourwifehot.com

The post below is re-blogged from Cindy English and her site, “Cheating Ways” She does not condone or judge the issue of infidelity. Her site has great material on the ins and outs (sorry about that pun!) of infidelity. I added a few comments as well.

The question is as old as the problem itself…

Why do men cheat?
Is monogamy really a myth?
Are guys predestined to cheat because it is human nature?

Scientists have long explained that men are biologically motivated to seek out multiple sex partners. This natural instinct ensures a healthy gene pool and the survival of our species.

If this is true, then one cannot expect fidelity from a man. It kind of lets guys off the hook when they wander doesn’t it?

So why do they feel guilty? If it is a man’s biological right to have sex wherever, whenever, with whomever, why should they worry about being caught?

Because somewhere along the way, self imposed “ethics” and “morality” placed restrictions on human behavior…including sex!

Perhaps if guys didn’t seem to derive such pleasure from sex, it wouldn’t be such a sin. Think about it. If sex with multiple partners were just another “chore” for men as cleaning house and cooking meals is to women, would we get upset about it?

Probably not…poor guys!
Nevertheless…men do enjoy sex…a lot…and not always with their partner!

Here are their Top 10 reasons…

I’d like to say that they are in no particular order but, we all know what guys say is the number one reason that they cheat. Remember ladies, the jokes about sex ending when marriage begins, wouldn’t be funny if there weren’t some truth to them!

1. Not getting enough at home! Women tend to get caught up in “life” and sex gets put on the “back burner”. She may be bent over helping the kids tie their shoes but he’s still looking at her “nice ass”. God…is that all they think about?
2. It’s reassuring to know that he’s still “got it”. Time has a way of making us all feel less sexy and desirable. A little forbidden rendezvous can be a real shot to a sagging male ego.
3. The wife just isn’t physically appealing anymore. Face it, women do tend to let themselves go. Often they get too busy raising their families and neglect themselves. They are too tired to put on make up or do those thigh slimming exercises. The result? A sexy new secretary and whatdayaknow…”Honey…I have to work late”! Don’t let this happen. Your wife WANTS to be hot and your support and encouragement may be the catlyst she needs.
4. Sex at home is boring. The wife doesn’t like to try new things (or old things – namely, blow jobs!). To men, variety is the spice of life and he may have some sexual urges that his wife is not willing to fulfill. He may have some ideas that he would rather his wife didn’t know about. Can you say “manage-a-trios”?
5. He just couldn’t say no. The woman was hot and all over him. It just seemed like a once in a lifetime opportunity…too good to pass up. This is where the phrase “thinking with their little head” came from!
6. The wife just isn’t fun anymore. She worries, she nags, she fusses and they fight all of the time. He cheats to “get away from it all”. Guys, this is half YOUR fault! Be sure to be fun yourself and treat her right.
7. He just doesn’t love his wife anymore. And just how do you tell someone that tactfully? It is easier to have an affair than it is to deal with the pain and emotional upheaval of such a confession. On the other hand…if he is caught cheating? Well, the door is then opened for a speedy exit!
8. The thrill of the chase is exhilarating. Some men are truly addicted not only to the act of sex itself, but to the hunt. They thrive on the rush they get when they are able to conquer even the toughest “ice queen”. It’s not about love, it’s about control and winning! Men are built for competition and war.
9. They cheat because they can. Many men know that their wives are insecure and dependant on them. They also know that low self esteem and a fear of being alone will keep her “in place” and “at home” no matter what, or who they do. So, why not? Variety – remember?
10. And finally, men cheat to get even! It is an absolute blow to the male ego for his sexual prowess to be in question. Why else would a woman cheat on him? His own affair as a result, serves two purposes, revenge and reassurance of manhood.

These are the top 10 reasons. There are probably many more. Are any of them “excuseable”? Mmmm…a couple…maybe (although most women won’t agree).

Are any of them “preventable”?
Of course.

Although monogamy may not human nature…it is a choice!

For more ideas and strategies to create a LOVE AFFAIR with your wife, visit www.makeyourwifehot.com and have the passionate relationship you deserve.

After many years of marriage, many people slip into a dull, unfulfilled, and routine marriage. If you or your wife is shy, this “role play” idea will take some getting used to. If you are completely clueless, watch the opening scenes from “4 Christmases” with Vince Vaughn. He and his girlfriend (Reese Witherspoon) do an excellent “role play” where she gets picked up at the bar from a “stranger” (her boyfriend of many years). Even though they haven’t been married, because both sets of parents are divorced, they know that they have to keep things fresh to keep their love alive!

Even if you are not an actor, it pays to role play every once in a while. Who knows? You may actually get into it. There is nothing to be embarrassed about, after all. You are already married! She’s seen you scratch yourself and fart at the dinner table, what could be worse? Are you dressing up like a cowboy, ready to herd some cattle? Hardly.

Before you go crazy, it may be best to start with something innocent, light-hearted and easy.  After you experiment with some cute and silly things, I recommend upgrading to having a full blown affair…with your wife! There is nothing as exciting as having sex with a forbidden lover. Sure, you can start with the blindfold and the costumes. Here are a few ideas for beginners:

• Pretend you are teenagers and your parents are about to come home…quickie time!
• Imagine you are the pool boy and speak no English. Have you wife SLOWLY seduce you
• Become the opposite of your personality (Bad boys be nice!)
• Have you wife play hard to get at the bar. For added thrills, have her toss a drink in your face
• Pretend you are a judge at a beauty contest and you need to speak to her alone…
• Let her be the boss at your “job”. Have her forcibly have sex with you in your home office
• Be a service technician and surprise her in the shower (no plumber’s crack please)
• Have her be a stripper for you. Offer her some $$$ for extras and make sure she refuses for a while
• Let her be a foreign exchange student asking for directions
• (Here’s a classic) Be her gynecologist and tell her you are retiring today!
• Get in a huge fight over nothing. Threaten to leave her, reconcile and have great make up sex

You get the idea. It may be too much for some folks to wear costumes right away. However, taking on simple personalities or persona’s can be fun, embarrassing (who cares?) and definitely titillating once you get the hang of it. The more punch you can put into your roles, the more exciting it will be for the two of you.

“Yeah, right!” You might say, “Maybe YOUR wife can be easily pursaded to dress up like a school girl or playboy bunny, but my wife would laugh first or worse, ignore such a ridiculous suggestion.” Well chump, I am here to tell you that MY wife was one of the most conservative and shy women you will ever meet years ago. Her transformation to a sexually charged borderline nympho took time, patience a huge amount of influence and persuasion.

Most men attack the sex topic like a warrior. This is NOT the time to use your masculine tendencies. When working on influencing and persuading your wife to open up, experiment and “try” new things, your guiding force will be your confidence, playfulness, charm and psychological superiority.

That’s right…psychological superiority. I am not talking about hypnosis or any of that garbage. However, anticipating reactions and moving in advance of her predictable response is child’s play once you know the rules and how to bend them. One of the most POWERFUL books you can read on persuasion when it comes to women and sex is “How to Be an Expert Persuader.”

I highly recommend it. Click Here!

Don’t forget to ratchet up the game with some infidelity with a stranger, lover, or foreign dignitary. (No celebrities or co-workers, please) If you can re-create the thrill of an affair you will guarantee “off the chart” sex that you can dial up as easy as a call girl!

For great ideas on getting you and you wife to have BETTER sex, connection and intimacy than ever before, visit www.makeyourwifehot.com. Your fantasies CAN become realities. It takes patience, consistency and a dash of creativity, but you CAN HAVE IT ALL! get a copy of this book and increase your wife’s sex drive naturally and consistently. You’ve tried everything else, now it is time to be the prince charming she desires and get her to be the vixen you crave.