Sue Your Cheating Spouse’s Lover!

Doug

If your spouse cheated on you, you can sue!

Read the article below in its entirety. It doesn’t matter if you’ve cheated, been cheated on or are currently involved in an affair or not, our litigious society has another milestone we can be proud or ashamed of, depending on your point of view.

Read on and think twice before you step out of your marriage vows! (Or if your spouse has already committed adultery, you now have a financial incentive in your arsenal, if you aren’t the forgiving type) If you are a guy that sees sex as sport and aren’t satisfied at home, give you wife the gift of love this season. Click here for the gift that you REALLY, TRULY want this Christmas….I guarantee it.

Story is below…

Atlanta, Georgia (CNN) — The next time a married man or woman glances your way, you might think twice before acting on impulse and frolicking between satin sheets. The scorned spouse could sue you.

Yes, you read that right. You, the paramour, can get hit with a lawsuit that could cost you hundreds of thousands of dollars.

They’re known as “alienation of affection” suits, when an “outsider” interferes in a marriage. The suits are allowed in seven states: Hawaii, Illinois, Mississippi, New Mexico, North Carolina, South Dakota and Utah.

The law allowing such legal action dates back to antiquated times when a wife was considered the property of a husband. A broken-hearted hubby could go after his wife’s lover — not with a gun, but with the law.

In modern times, the suits are filed for two reasons: money and revenge. Juries in North Carolina have handed out awards in excess of $1 million on multiple occasions.

“If your spouse is going to cheat, you really would like them to cheat with somebody who has a lot of money,” says Lee Rosen, a North Carolina divorce attorney who deals with alienation of affection cases on a daily basis.

And that’s why many legal experts are paying close attention to the Tiger Woods saga. Will his wife go after an alleged mistress?

Were any of his “transgressions” with someone who is married? If so, the jilted hubby might be able to go after the world’s richest golfer.

It doesn’t matter that Woods lives in Florida, a state where the suits aren’t allowed, legal experts say. If any of Woods’ professed “sins” took place in an alienation of affection state, look out.

“If he had been dating a married woman, there could be the potential for a lucrative recovery,” Rosen says. “You’ve got to have a really affluent paramour that makes for a good target.”

The suits rarely make it to trial. Usually, just the threat of such a lawsuit is enough for an out-of-court settlement.

“When folks are getting divorced, the threat of having the person’s new boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or wife dragged into court and the dirty laundry aired … causes enormous pressure,” says Matt Steffey, a law professor at Mississippi College School of Law.

Mississippi has been rocked by a high-profile suit, filed this summer, involving everything from allegations of ski resort trysts to a secret journal ordered kept under seal by a judge.

Better yet, it involves a congressman who once co-sponsored legislation for President George W. Bush to declare 2008 the “National Year of the Bible.”

The son of a prominent federal judge in Mississippi, Chip Pickering was the rising GOP star of the state — hand-picked to succeed Trent Lott in the U.S. Senate. Then, everything unraveled.

If your spouse is going to cheat, you really would like them to cheat with somebody who has a lot of money.
–Lee Rosen

Pickering decided not to run for re-election in 2008 after 12 years in the House. At the time, he said he wanted to spend more time with his family. He’s married with five children.

Like a tale from William Faulkner, who penned many a book on Mississippi elite with personal flaws, Pickering’s tumble has been staggering.

“Chip Pickering has fallen far faster than the surrender of Vicksburg,” Steffey says, referring to a key turning point in the Civil War, when Confederates gave up the Mississippi River town.

The real doozy came July 14, when Leisha Pickering filed the alienation of affection suit against her husband’s alleged lover, a socialite named Elizabeth Creekmore-Byrd.

“As a direct and proximate result of the negligent, wrongful and reckless misconduct and behavior of Creekmore-Byrd with Pickering,” the suit says, “plaintiff has suffered damage to the affection and consortium with her husband.”

So hush-hush is the case, lawyers on both sides have reached a confidential agreement to not discuss the case publicly.

The suit, in effect, has branded the once-proud congressman with a Scarlet “A.” “He had certainly fallen from the pinnacle of his professional life and his public life, but it had not yet become a public disgrace,” Steffey says. “And what this lawsuit did is it turned a fall into a disgrace.”

“There’s a particular cast of tragedy when people are undone, not by accidental misfortune, but by their own character defects.”

Most states have abolished alienation of affection lawsuits. Proponents in the holdout states say the threat of such legal action helps protect the sanctity of marriage.

But, Steffey and Rosen say, alienation of affection suits do just the opposite: They result in already contentious divorces getting even more heated, and they leave behind a public trail of personal shortcomings and wild tales of infidelity.

“To allow these suits to go forward,” Steffey says, “is destructive to family life.”

“It’s much like dropping a nuclear bomb on a family,” Rosen says. “It really does damage the relationship between spouses. If there are children involved, it’s devastating for them.”

It would require legislative action for states to change the law. And anyone who tries that in a conservative state could get painted as a pro-divorce lawmaker who holds cheaters less accountable.

“It’s a very delicate matter legislatively,” Steffey says.

And as long as the law remains on the books, Rosen says, he’ll keep busy: “We have an obligation to pursue our clients’ rights.”

There is one way to avoid such suits: Respect marital vows.

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Of course, if you can’t keep it zipped, you can either get divorced or begin a campaign for an open marriage! Polyamory isn’t popular, but those who understand human evolution and aren’t threatened by multiple loves have shown its possible. One of my favorite books on this topic is Jenny Blocks’ “Open”. Check it out!


Tiger Woods: Infidelty or Poor Driving?

Doug

tiger woodsWas Tiger Woods having an affair? There is no clarity to his recent car accident and golf-club wielding wife’s desire to break a window or his cheating skull. All men of power and influence are susceptible to affairs. If he had one…chalk it up to his DNA, childhood or conflicted relegation of his powers. If, indeed it is true that he is “involved” with Rachel Uchitel, I can understand. It would be nothing new.

This is a pattern you may be familiar with. The alpha male, who has incredible laser focus on his work is a warrior, a conqueror and this personality is not limited to war or business. It often spills over into the world of seduction. On the surface they may be “good” people. He is an achiever; he has a nice wife and a beautiful family. But underneath the façade is a man who is built for conquest.

It is men (and some women) whose achievements expand exponentially who are in danger of having affairs. There are two main reasons for this.

  1. 1. Environmental Influence. Men who are raised on “James Bond” and other fantasy visions of relationships may suffer from a mild or extreme case of sex and love addiction. The inability to have a deep, long-term relationship is often created from the role models we have as children. This easily explains why kids from divorced homes are more likely to divorce. The pattern has been established and we learn from our environment. When men see their fathers or role models embrace sex for sex’s sake, what are they learning?

As a young man enters puberty and begins to notice those newly developed breasts on his classmates, the process of maturity, courtship and dating begin. We experiment with the rituals of “going steady” “breaking up” and “falling in love.” It is during these times that we are imprinted with what works for us and what does not. Learning to differentiate between caring for someone and lust, between being genuine with someone or manipulating to get what we want is a game without a rule book. Learning how to accept someone “loving us” is a class that starts in adolescence and for some of us, becomes a never-ending lesson.

Similarly, when a young man has a father who is nurturing, compassionate and faithful to his wife, the imprint of fidelity has a chance. This does not guarantee or prevent infidelity, of course. However, the odds are stacked against youth from homes that have any variety of dysfunction.

On that note, we are hard-pressed to find ANY family without some degree of dysfunction. The “Cleaver” household is as fictional as your neighbors who appear to be the “perfect” family.

No such thing exists.

Surviving an affair is a journey anyone would be a fool to take alone. If you were the one having the affair or the victim of one, going at reconciliation or renewal alone will be a painful and long journey. I STRONGLY recommend the eBook “Break Free From the Affair” by Dr. Huizenga the Infidelity coach.

For men like Tiger Woods, who was probably busy golfing 4 hours per day, these opportunities may have been missed. Or perhaps his obsessive desire to win created a method of winning with the ladies. “Winning” meant conquest-not a deep, heartfelt relationship. I am not picking on Tiger, because at this date, we still have no confirmation of any infidelity.

  1. 2. Over-Achiever Influence. The second manifestations of affairs come from our DNA of being warriors. Forget the imprinting and nurturing households. Men who compete in sports, politics, and business are merely acting out modern day survival and conqueror behaviors. Men who are taught or encouraged to achieve at all costs are usually successful. Powerful men wield their power and the more then earn, the more dangerous they become to themselves and others. The adage, “Power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely” has never been truer when the affairs are revealed amongst politicians, athletes, and titans of industry. Their alpha male characteristics spill over from business to relationships as naturally as a waterfall.

I believe high achievers often miss out on this important segment of their lives, since the ultimate achievement goal takes precedence. Their inner life and the richness experienced in relationships become dormant or non-existent.

Men are built for war. Women are built for sex. I apologize for putting it in such a callous manner, but since we don’t have breasts, it is an argument that has no defense. Certainly we can both become MORE than objects of conquest and reproduction, but we are designed for those functions and it is the evolution of civilization that allows us to become better.

Rachel Uchitel...victim, gold digger or just another hottie?

Rachel Uchitel...victim, gold digger or just another hottie?

It is as simple as this.

Some men are further along on the evolutionary cycle than others. Men who understand how to wield and channel their power for the good of the tribe win. Those who are still learning how to develop loving feelings in a long-term relationship are those that will create the best families (Tribes) and hopefully pass on their character to their offspring.

For those of us who are still learning, let’s keep our lessons fresh in our minds and learn from our mistakes and the mistakes of others.

We don’t know yet, if Tiger was having an affair or not. Frankly, I don’t care.

But if the fall of a hero compels even one person to re-evaluate his destiny in life, then we move forward as a society. If you are involved or were involved in this common and confusing circumstance of an affair, you owe it to yourself to get a copy of the book, “Break Free From the Affair” today. You’ll save hours of sleepless nights and feel better about yourself, regardless of who did what.survive affair